It has been over a year since Pat has written....and it's a shame because rediculous things happen nearly everyday. Students become more confused and obsurd by the minute and, perhaps, feeling overwelmed by it all Pat has temporarily discontinued the confessions of a secretary.
This afternoon a student walks into the office.
"Hi- I need to talk to someone about credits?"
That's very vague- Pat pushes for more information, "Transfer credit?"
"Kind of," the student replies. How can it kind of be transfer credit? It either is or isn't.
"I think I need to talk to the head English person...."they" told me I need to speak to the guy over English because I want to see if I can not have to take a class." That doesn't sound like transfer credit to Pat.
Pat shakes her head a little trying to make the words that have just gone in her ears fall into logical place in her mind.
"Ok....what class are you trying to get out of?"
"I tested into 890 and it's really easy for me so I need to get out of 990."
Thank goodness, Pat thinks, this one is not her problem. "Actually we are only over college-level courses. You need to go to the remedial office upstairs."
"The thing is that I already took one of these classes at _____ University but it didn't transfer."
Pat begins to look up the student's transcript to find out what the problem is, but as she's typing she learns that the real problem is just the student....
"It was called 101 there but it came in as an elective. I don't know why because _________ University is a higher University than here....so whatever."
Pat narrows her eyes. Here are the things that she wants to say:
"A higher University in what way? They have University status and so do we. Do you mean higher in accreditation? Because we have the highest form of accreditation. Do you even have the slightest idea what accreditation entails....or is? No- you don't. So, do you just mean a higher University in your little mind because you personally feel as if it is better than here? Right- just checking. Ok then, how they number their classes is insignificant. Just because they call their random class 101 does not mean that it is equivilant to our 1010 course. And in this case it appears as if it is not because it transfered in as an elective and not our 1010. That seems pretty clear to me. And furthermore, I find it particularly unlikely that you took a class that is equivilant in your mind to our 1010 less than a year ago and then came here and took our placement test and tested 2 classes below college level. Perhaps your superior university left you ill-prepared for furthering your education?"
Instead, Pat smiles and says, "If you have a question about re-evaluating that transferred class then you will need to speak to the Transfer Credit office. Otherwise, if your question is about a 990 course than you need to speak to the redial department, as we do not cover those classes."
"OK....downstairs."
"No- upstairs," Pat says. Good attention to detail. I guess it's hard to listen to instructions when your head is so full of false information.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
First Day of Classes: The Good News and the Bad News
So, it's the first day of classes and Pat was quite shocked and pleased to find that it did not take over 20 minutes to find a parking spot. However......although the process of getting into work and parking was shorter....Pat did nearly get hit by a bus that was swerving to avoid some student riding their bike down the middle of the road. It's a good news, bad news thing.
I supposed Pat could just be relieved overall that a parking place was secured and no one was flattened by a bus.
I supposed Pat could just be relieved overall that a parking place was secured and no one was flattened by a bus.
Getting Downstairs
Lost Students flock to Pat's office like moths to a flame. (please excuse the cheesy metaphor)
"Where is classroom number 027?!" They demand, out of breath.
Pat attempts to calm them with a soothing tone,
"027 would be downstairs," Pat attempts to get back to work but the stress of being lost has depleted the student's brain cells.
"How do I get downstairs?"
Really???
"Most people just walk down the stairs. They're right across the hall." Pat points in the general direction.
The student turns and rushes off a little bit embarrassed and a little bit wiser.
"Where is classroom number 027?!" They demand, out of breath.
Pat attempts to calm them with a soothing tone,
"027 would be downstairs," Pat attempts to get back to work but the stress of being lost has depleted the student's brain cells.
"How do I get downstairs?"
Really???
"Most people just walk down the stairs. They're right across the hall." Pat points in the general direction.
The student turns and rushes off a little bit embarrassed and a little bit wiser.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Would You Like an Appointment with that Attitude?
A student calls the department.
Pat answers politely and professionally.
"Yeah, I need to talk to (an adviser...let's call her....Amy.) Amy."
Pat attempts to save the student some time.
"Were you wanting to make an appointment with her?"
Without warning the student's attitude rises suddenly. Surprise- it's little miss nasty,
"No! I wanted to talk to her!"
Well....just excuse Pat. Pat doesn't bother to tell the student that that won't be possible today as Amy is out of the office,
"Let me transfer you," Pat says instead.
Pat watches the clock. Two minutes later the phone rings the familiar number and Pat smiles a little. Pat answers and finds that little miss nasty is sounding a little bit frustrated and lost, not having reached her adviser. Not so cocky now, is she?
"Yeah....I need to talk with Amy."
Pat smiles smugly. Pat knew the student would be back with a slightly changed attitude. Pat's voice suddenly becomes sugary sweet and dripping with sarcasm.
"Would you like to make an appointment?"
Pat answers politely and professionally.
"Yeah, I need to talk to (an adviser...let's call her....Amy.) Amy."
Pat attempts to save the student some time.
"Were you wanting to make an appointment with her?"
Without warning the student's attitude rises suddenly. Surprise- it's little miss nasty,
"No! I wanted to talk to her!"
Well....just excuse Pat. Pat doesn't bother to tell the student that that won't be possible today as Amy is out of the office,
"Let me transfer you," Pat says instead.
Pat watches the clock. Two minutes later the phone rings the familiar number and Pat smiles a little. Pat answers and finds that little miss nasty is sounding a little bit frustrated and lost, not having reached her adviser. Not so cocky now, is she?
"Yeah....I need to talk with Amy."
Pat smiles smugly. Pat knew the student would be back with a slightly changed attitude. Pat's voice suddenly becomes sugary sweet and dripping with sarcasm.
"Would you like to make an appointment?"
Monday, August 23, 2010
It's That Time of Year Again
Fall semester is approaching and, as such is the case, Pat is back and has much to write about. Please join in the adventures of fall semester..........
The beginning of the semester means about 10 things for Pat:
1. Parking lots and University streets are crawling with student pedestrians that do not read signs, pay no attention to traffic laws and oncoming traffic, and will walk out straight in front of you despite the fact that they can obviously hear and see you car. Good luck parking or moving in your vehicle whatsoever everyone!
2. Clueless freshman are wondering lost throughout all hallways and believe that everyone office on their way is one big map , filled with tour guides whose sole purpose is to lead and direct them to all of their classrooms and destinations.
3. Everyone is trying to meet with their adviser. They are always shocked when the said adviser is not available and never understand that everyone else is also trying to meet with the adviser.
4. Every student that walks into Pat's department is trying to register at the last minute....instead of 3-4 months ago.
5. Every student is an exception and has a special case or story.
6. Students don't understand the concept of a waiting list and are trying to thrust add cards in your hands, begging for signatures.
7. Every adviser is on anti-depressants....or needs to be.
8. Administrative Support professionals, campus wide are considering quitting.
9. The phones ring constantly at the worst possible moment and although you may have gone for an hour and a half without a phone call, the second that it starts ringing two or three calls will come through at once.
10.Students park in employee parking and employees circle 2-3 lots searching for spots and spearing under their breathe.
The beginning of the semester means about 10 things for Pat:
1. Parking lots and University streets are crawling with student pedestrians that do not read signs, pay no attention to traffic laws and oncoming traffic, and will walk out straight in front of you despite the fact that they can obviously hear and see you car. Good luck parking or moving in your vehicle whatsoever everyone!
2. Clueless freshman are wondering lost throughout all hallways and believe that everyone office on their way is one big map , filled with tour guides whose sole purpose is to lead and direct them to all of their classrooms and destinations.
3. Everyone is trying to meet with their adviser. They are always shocked when the said adviser is not available and never understand that everyone else is also trying to meet with the adviser.
4. Every student that walks into Pat's department is trying to register at the last minute....instead of 3-4 months ago.
5. Every student is an exception and has a special case or story.
6. Students don't understand the concept of a waiting list and are trying to thrust add cards in your hands, begging for signatures.
7. Every adviser is on anti-depressants....or needs to be.
8. Administrative Support professionals, campus wide are considering quitting.
9. The phones ring constantly at the worst possible moment and although you may have gone for an hour and a half without a phone call, the second that it starts ringing two or three calls will come through at once.
10.Students park in employee parking and employees circle 2-3 lots searching for spots and spearing under their breathe.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Dear Students- A Prerequisite Is....
Dear Students,
It has come to my attention in the years that I have worked on campus that many of you have difficulty defining the term "Prerequisite" based on your utter lack of understanding when I utter this word. Allow me to define it for you and please take note:
pre·req·ui·site
–adjective
1.required beforehand
—Synonyms
2. requirement, requisite, essential, precondition.
Therefore, if class A is a prerequisite for class B then you MUST complete class A before you are eligible to take class B. There is no exception, no examinations and no override that can eliminate this requirement. Even if you feel that you are special and an exception to every rule, the policy stands. Your personal desire to establish your schedule in such a way will not change any of this.
From now on when I explain that it is a prerequisite, please understand the term I am using and do not drag on the conversation into a nonsensical argument. I have already answered your question and there is nothing more to discuss on the matter.
Sincerely,
Pat
It has come to my attention in the years that I have worked on campus that many of you have difficulty defining the term "Prerequisite" based on your utter lack of understanding when I utter this word. Allow me to define it for you and please take note:
pre·req·ui·site
–adjective
1.required beforehand
—Synonyms
2. requirement, requisite, essential, precondition.
Therefore, if class A is a prerequisite for class B then you MUST complete class A before you are eligible to take class B. There is no exception, no examinations and no override that can eliminate this requirement. Even if you feel that you are special and an exception to every rule, the policy stands. Your personal desire to establish your schedule in such a way will not change any of this.
From now on when I explain that it is a prerequisite, please understand the term I am using and do not drag on the conversation into a nonsensical argument. I have already answered your question and there is nothing more to discuss on the matter.
Sincerely,
Pat
Friday, April 30, 2010
Give Me the Code
A student calls at 5:30pm asking Pat for the "university code"? Pat has no idea what the student is talking about or why the student is talking to Pat.
"What code are you referring to?"
"The code that I need for my FAFSA."
Not a question for Pat's department at all. "Hold on, I am going to transfer you to financial aid," Pat tries to remain cheerful and helpful although this is a ridiculous waste of her time and the student has virtually no reason to be calling a random department within the university for this information.
The student is mumbling something to their parent in the background, "Wait! Are you sending me to the testing center?"
Did Pat say that? Why would Pat do that? "No....I am going to transfer you to a department that actually deals with FAFSA and financial aid,"
Pat doesn't wait for a response. pat hits transfer. Too bad no one will answer at financial aid for the student because the office is closed......still not Pat's problem.
"What code are you referring to?"
"The code that I need for my FAFSA."
Not a question for Pat's department at all. "Hold on, I am going to transfer you to financial aid," Pat tries to remain cheerful and helpful although this is a ridiculous waste of her time and the student has virtually no reason to be calling a random department within the university for this information.
The student is mumbling something to their parent in the background, "Wait! Are you sending me to the testing center?"
Did Pat say that? Why would Pat do that? "No....I am going to transfer you to a department that actually deals with FAFSA and financial aid,"
Pat doesn't wait for a response. pat hits transfer. Too bad no one will answer at financial aid for the student because the office is closed......still not Pat's problem.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)